I was raised Baptist so the concept of Ash Wednesday is pretty foreign to me. I always assumed that it had something to do with Easter and repentance but had never taken the time to recognize its significance. The only recollection I have of Ash Wednesday is when Patricia worked downtown in Savannah. One day I met her for lunch and I noticed all the people coming out of St John's Cathedral with ash crosses on their foreheads. I never gave it a second thought since, as a Baptist, we don't observe Ash Wednesday or Lent. We do, however, celebrate the dickens out of Easter.
I decided this morning to do a little more reading on the subject of Ash Wednesday. In Biblical times it was customary to smear ashes on yourself if you were truly in a state of repentance or mourning. I have been pondering this all morning. I know that there are very many sincere children of God who observe Ash Wednesday with all the repentance and mourning over their own sinful condition. The tradition is steaped in Biblical history. The custom of using ashes to symbolize sincere mourning was used as far back as Job. Job was disgusted with himself when he viewed the sinful wretch that he was. He took all the blame for his depraved condition and symbolized that by wearing sackcloth and sitting in ashes. Ash Wednesday is the start of the 40 days before Easter. The 40 days is to be spent in fasting or some sort. Some people go all out and only have bread and water much like Jesus did when he spent 40 days in the wilderness.
Just coming out of the Mardi Gras season with the climax being Fat Tuesday, the day before Ash Wednesday, its hard to take the majority seriously. I mean, you party like it 1999, then overnight, you are transformed into this mournful, repentant soul. I have a problem not seeing that as a little bit hypocritical.
I have decided that I will take this season seriously. I am not sure if God would have me fast, expecially since it is lunch time and I am as hungry as a fat kid in a candy store, but I feel like he wants me to do something to make this season meaningful.
I heard a song that was originally done by Christ for the Nations called Unto the Lamb. Like I always do, I analyze and research things to death. I ended up on the Christ for the Nations website. I watched a video about their worship. The guy speaking was talking about how when they come to worship they find many times that worship has already begun before they get on the stage to play. WOW! I thought, "I would love for that to happen". One Sunday, I would like to arrive at the First Church and find that everyone in the room is on their faces before God. No need to play, no need to sing a note. The Spirit of God has already called his people to worship. That would be something to see. I have found several times this week that it hasn't taken much to get me in a worshipful frame of mind. I have played, "Unto the Lamb" so many times on my iPod that it automatically goes to it when I turn it on. I cried over the Gateway Worship song "My Everything" so many times that I have almost shorted out the battery.
I think that the season of Lent should be filled with worship. Yeah, that's it. My goal is that when Easter arrives and I dress myself up in my best, that my heart will be in the presence of God. I hope that when I arrive, God is already there and His presence has so filled the temple that those who arrived before me, are already on their faces. The organ isn't playing, the PowerPoint isn't rolling. The only sounds are the sounds are the sounds of weeping as the people of God experience the presence of God. That would be something to see.
So, here's my fast. I will fast as Jesus did. Not literally, but spiritually. I don't think realistically that I could survive on bread and water. Maybe doughnuts and Diet Coke. Now that is a fast I could keep.
I don't really know how this will happen but I know the Holy Spirit will teach me.
Blessings
Allen
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Friday, March 4, 2011
Why Do You Work
Hey Guys
I had an assignment for Psychology Class this past week. The assignment was a discussion forum that focused on the reasons we work, are we doing what we love to do, and stuff like that. Since I am a Psychology/Christian Counseling major, we are always asked to include the spiritual compenent on every assignment. I decided to post it here because I used a post by my blogging friend Jason as inspiration for part of it. (Thanks Buddy). Anyway, I made a 100 on it and my professor said that it was an AMAZING post. Any time I can appear to be smart, I have to make sure others see it. Wonders never cease.
"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God."
1 Corinthians 10:31
Why do you work?
I work to glorify God. I don’t do so all the time but that is my primary focus. I didn't’t always have this attitude about work but the economic crunch we have all experienced changed my point of view. I was laid off in February 2009 and after a year of unemployment took a job that pays about a third of my normal salary. I spent a lot of time asking God, why. Why after all the years I had spent working hard and giving everything I had to my job, was I finding myself at the beginning again. Why, as I approached 50 years old, I have to start over like a teenager. I was reminded of this Scripture in 1 Corinthians 10:31 “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God”. Every moment has sacred potential to be a moment where we glorify God, no matter if we have a job or not, or if our job is to prepare meals for our family, fold laundry or drive the family shuttle van. So it is with viewpoint that I approach my life and my work. Every moment is given to me as an opportunity to glorify God. I fail often. I wake up in a foul mood and shuffle around the home that, barring some miracle, I am destined to lose and think, “Good Lord, its morning”.
I have a blogger buddy of mine that posted something this week on his blog that really hit home with me about this subject. I asked permission to use his words as inspiration, he obliged. “Wherever you find yourself, you are to pour yourself out for the good of those around you. Working with spreadsheets can be every bit as important and ‘Godly Work’ as preparing a sermon”. (Mitchell)/> It’s all about bringing glory to God. We have this impression that all the secular work will be burned up and that all the ministry work we do, mainly church work, will endure into eternity. I think that all work is sacred. It is all an opportunity to display our love and obedience to God. We honor Him when we work hard.
In the days of the early revivals in Europe the phrase “Protestant work ethic” was used to describe the work ethic displayed by Christians. Christians worked harder, didn't’t drink, didn't’t party and missed less time from work. They worked for a higher boss than their earthly employer and it showed. “Redemption and Lift” was another phrase used to describe the prosperity experienced by believers. It seemed that when people got saved, their priorities changed and so did their economic status. Since they no longer spent their money gambling and drinking they were able to spend their money on their families and could afford nicer houses in better neighborhoods. I am not an advocate of the prosperity gospel. I don’t agree that God promises financial prosperity to every believer but I know that the little I have is not spent in ways that dishonor God.
Am I doing the thing that I enjoy most?
I would like to say that am passionate about my work and that I am doing the thing that I enjoy most, but that would be a lie. I love the people that I work with and in the few months that we have been a team, we have all become a very close-knit “family”. I work for the Public Works Department of our county as an Administrative Specialist. (I am told that is actually a secretary). When I think about having to one day leave this place and find a job that actually pays the bills, I am very sad. I have two bosses that have become very good friends. I can’t bear the thought of leaving them but, I am afraid that one day, when the economy improves and employers are hiring in my field again, that the day will come.
I am a musician and worship leader. Those are the things I am passionate about. I don’t have to do that full-time or receive compensation to be validated in my passions. If I had the choice to do anything, leading worship would be my dream job. Right now I would be content to work full-time and lead worship voluntarily at our church.
Society tells us, especially men, that our value as human beings and our worth to society is determined by our careers and vocations. It shouldn't’t be surprising, with approximately 11 million (actually it’s more like 23 million) people out of work, that people are feeling unappreciated and undervalued. We, as Christians, need to concentrate on the value and worth that we have through Christ. Basically what I am saying is that as Christians, our “work” is to glorify God whether that is working at a job that all your training, experience and age says is beneath you or folding laundry, clipping coupons, schooling children or shuttling family members, your focus is to glorify God. All work is honorable as long as it honors God and we should take satisfaction and contentment from that. But work should pay the bills.
There is an old gospel song that basically sums up my life at this point;
One day at time, Lord Jesus, that’s all I’m asking from You
Just give me the strength to do everyday what I have to do
Yesterdays gone, and tomorrow may never be mine
Teach me today, show me the way, one day at a time.
Blessings
Allen
Mitchell, J. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://clearlyvague.blogspot.com/2011/02/few-more-thoughts-on-glory-and-meaning.html
I had an assignment for Psychology Class this past week. The assignment was a discussion forum that focused on the reasons we work, are we doing what we love to do, and stuff like that. Since I am a Psychology/Christian Counseling major, we are always asked to include the spiritual compenent on every assignment. I decided to post it here because I used a post by my blogging friend Jason as inspiration for part of it. (Thanks Buddy). Anyway, I made a 100 on it and my professor said that it was an AMAZING post. Any time I can appear to be smart, I have to make sure others see it. Wonders never cease.
"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God."
1 Corinthians 10:31
Why do you work?
I work to glorify God. I don’t do so all the time but that is my primary focus. I didn't’t always have this attitude about work but the economic crunch we have all experienced changed my point of view. I was laid off in February 2009 and after a year of unemployment took a job that pays about a third of my normal salary. I spent a lot of time asking God, why. Why after all the years I had spent working hard and giving everything I had to my job, was I finding myself at the beginning again. Why, as I approached 50 years old, I have to start over like a teenager. I was reminded of this Scripture in 1 Corinthians 10:31 “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God”. Every moment has sacred potential to be a moment where we glorify God, no matter if we have a job or not, or if our job is to prepare meals for our family, fold laundry or drive the family shuttle van. So it is with viewpoint that I approach my life and my work. Every moment is given to me as an opportunity to glorify God. I fail often. I wake up in a foul mood and shuffle around the home that, barring some miracle, I am destined to lose and think, “Good Lord, its morning”.
I have a blogger buddy of mine that posted something this week on his blog that really hit home with me about this subject. I asked permission to use his words as inspiration, he obliged. “Wherever you find yourself, you are to pour yourself out for the good of those around you. Working with spreadsheets can be every bit as important and ‘Godly Work’ as preparing a sermon”. (Mitchell)/> It’s all about bringing glory to God. We have this impression that all the secular work will be burned up and that all the ministry work we do, mainly church work, will endure into eternity. I think that all work is sacred. It is all an opportunity to display our love and obedience to God. We honor Him when we work hard.
In the days of the early revivals in Europe the phrase “Protestant work ethic” was used to describe the work ethic displayed by Christians. Christians worked harder, didn't’t drink, didn't’t party and missed less time from work. They worked for a higher boss than their earthly employer and it showed. “Redemption and Lift” was another phrase used to describe the prosperity experienced by believers. It seemed that when people got saved, their priorities changed and so did their economic status. Since they no longer spent their money gambling and drinking they were able to spend their money on their families and could afford nicer houses in better neighborhoods. I am not an advocate of the prosperity gospel. I don’t agree that God promises financial prosperity to every believer but I know that the little I have is not spent in ways that dishonor God.
Am I doing the thing that I enjoy most?
I would like to say that am passionate about my work and that I am doing the thing that I enjoy most, but that would be a lie. I love the people that I work with and in the few months that we have been a team, we have all become a very close-knit “family”. I work for the Public Works Department of our county as an Administrative Specialist. (I am told that is actually a secretary). When I think about having to one day leave this place and find a job that actually pays the bills, I am very sad. I have two bosses that have become very good friends. I can’t bear the thought of leaving them but, I am afraid that one day, when the economy improves and employers are hiring in my field again, that the day will come.
I am a musician and worship leader. Those are the things I am passionate about. I don’t have to do that full-time or receive compensation to be validated in my passions. If I had the choice to do anything, leading worship would be my dream job. Right now I would be content to work full-time and lead worship voluntarily at our church.
Society tells us, especially men, that our value as human beings and our worth to society is determined by our careers and vocations. It shouldn't’t be surprising, with approximately 11 million (actually it’s more like 23 million) people out of work, that people are feeling unappreciated and undervalued. We, as Christians, need to concentrate on the value and worth that we have through Christ. Basically what I am saying is that as Christians, our “work” is to glorify God whether that is working at a job that all your training, experience and age says is beneath you or folding laundry, clipping coupons, schooling children or shuttling family members, your focus is to glorify God. All work is honorable as long as it honors God and we should take satisfaction and contentment from that. But work should pay the bills.
There is an old gospel song that basically sums up my life at this point;
One day at time, Lord Jesus, that’s all I’m asking from You
Just give me the strength to do everyday what I have to do
Yesterdays gone, and tomorrow may never be mine
Teach me today, show me the way, one day at a time.
Blessings
Allen
Mitchell, J. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://clearlyvague.blogspot.com/2011/02/few-more-thoughts-on-glory-and-meaning.html
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Losing Focus
I happened upon a story about Florence Chadwick today. It seems that she became the first woman to swim the English Channel both ways. (Not all at once though) She later attempted to swim the 26 miles between Catalina and the Califonia coast but a thick fog rolled in making it impossible to see anything, especially the coast and the goal. She told her mother who was in one of the boats that she didn't think she could make it, so she was pulled into the boat only to discover that she only a mile away from shore. Because she couldnt' see the destination she was heading far, she lost her focus and gave up.
That's where I feel like I am. I've been swimming for such a long time, the fog has blinded my view. I had this awful sickness for weeks and I barely have a voice to speak much less sing. I tried to sing yesterday, and to be honest, it was so terrible that I gave up. Micah, who was in the next room, came out and never said a word. I know he thought, "He really is a has-been".
These have been fog filled days for us. Our home in limbo, living in vurtual poverty and doing our best to survive and honor God at the same time. We have yet to find a church where we feel that God could use us. We have been attending our home church lately, mostly because it's comfortable, not because anything spectacular is happening there.
We have been swimming and I was just about to the point of giving up and getting back in the boat and saying, "OK God, I can't make it" when I read this story.
I am reminded of a book I read years ago called "God's Eye View". It talked about how sometimes we are like children riding in an elevator filled with adults. All we can see from our level is knees and belt buckles. The adult don't seem to be afraid because they can see from a different perspective. You raise your arms for your dad to pick you up and all of a sudden, you relax. You can see things from your dad's eye view. It makes all the difference. I guess what I'm saying is, "Father, I am afraid. I am drowning in a sea of kneecaps and belt buckles. I am holding my arms up for you to pick me up. Sure I want to be held by you and hear you tell me that everything will be ok, but I also want to see things the way you see them. All I need is a little focus".
I am also reminded of the hymn (Which happens to be my favorite) "The Solid Rock". The chorus says, "Lord lift me up and let me stand by faith on heavens table land. I higher plane that I have found. Lord plant my feet on solid ground."
So, I will continue to swim because I don't want to quit and find out that I was almost there.
By the way, Ms. Chadwick, sucessfully swam the 26 miles two months later. The fog still rolled in but she finished because she kept a mental image of the coast in mind. THAT WILL PREACH!
Blessings
Allen
That's where I feel like I am. I've been swimming for such a long time, the fog has blinded my view. I had this awful sickness for weeks and I barely have a voice to speak much less sing. I tried to sing yesterday, and to be honest, it was so terrible that I gave up. Micah, who was in the next room, came out and never said a word. I know he thought, "He really is a has-been".
These have been fog filled days for us. Our home in limbo, living in vurtual poverty and doing our best to survive and honor God at the same time. We have yet to find a church where we feel that God could use us. We have been attending our home church lately, mostly because it's comfortable, not because anything spectacular is happening there.
We have been swimming and I was just about to the point of giving up and getting back in the boat and saying, "OK God, I can't make it" when I read this story.
I am reminded of a book I read years ago called "God's Eye View". It talked about how sometimes we are like children riding in an elevator filled with adults. All we can see from our level is knees and belt buckles. The adult don't seem to be afraid because they can see from a different perspective. You raise your arms for your dad to pick you up and all of a sudden, you relax. You can see things from your dad's eye view. It makes all the difference. I guess what I'm saying is, "Father, I am afraid. I am drowning in a sea of kneecaps and belt buckles. I am holding my arms up for you to pick me up. Sure I want to be held by you and hear you tell me that everything will be ok, but I also want to see things the way you see them. All I need is a little focus".
I am also reminded of the hymn (Which happens to be my favorite) "The Solid Rock". The chorus says, "Lord lift me up and let me stand by faith on heavens table land. I higher plane that I have found. Lord plant my feet on solid ground."
So, I will continue to swim because I don't want to quit and find out that I was almost there.
By the way, Ms. Chadwick, sucessfully swam the 26 miles two months later. The fog still rolled in but she finished because she kept a mental image of the coast in mind. THAT WILL PREACH!
Blessings
Allen
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Leaning Forward
I am currently reading a book by Bob Kauflin called "Worship Matters". It's a powerful book but I had gotten to a portion of the book that seemed hard to follow. I was having trouble keeping my attention on the book. Most times when this happens while I'm reading I will put the book away for a while and pick it up later; possibly weeks or months later. I've probably underlined more in this book than any other I have read.
I was about to put the book down when I came across a portion of the book that talked about "leaning forward" to hear what the Holy Spirit was saying. My heart was immediately pricked.
Recently we felt the call of God to return to our home church. We had not idea why, at this time, that God was leading us in this direction; we just knew it was time to go home. It's been almost 20 years since we've been there. Since that time they have added staff members, added a service and moved to a larger facility. Not much else has changed. Most of the faces of the people we loved all those years ago are still present along with a host of new ones; some born in and some coming into the fellowship on their own. Regardless, it's good to be home.
Why did this subject come up today? A couple of days ago Patricia and I were talking about how hungry our hearts were for real worship. We have found ourselves in the "sitting back" position not really expecting God to do anything miraculous. What a shame for a family who has experienced God in real and tangible ways.
How do I get back to a "leaning forward" position? I'm not really sure.
I reflected yesterday about how I had written something that had been misinterpreted and misunderstood by someone. I talked about how it had taken the wind out of my sails and I had not written much because of it. That posting was about expectancy. How ironic that the subject that was so fresh on my mind yesterday is again in the forefront of my mind. I remember the intimate times with my Father. I have experienced times of closeness that were so real that I believed that if I stretched out my hand, I would touch His face. Where has my sense of wonder gone? Why am I no longer leaning forward to hear His voice? Somewhere along the road I have leaned back and crossed my arms instead of leaning forward and listening intently to what God has to say about our situation.
Our family has faced struggle this past year and I'm afraid that the end is not in sight. How we will make it through the dark days to come is beyond me. I find myself in a state of anger sometimes. I wish I could just get to the place where I simply trusted God. I look into the faces of my family and am consumed with such guilt. I feel that I have failed them. "Children are resilient" I am told. "They will remember the faith you showed and the fact that the family held together through the tough times". I grew up poor, not because my parents didn't make good money but because my dad drank and gambled it away. There was little left after he paid his weekly bar tab and the gambling debts. Mom worked hard for minimum wage to afford us the things we had. I don't think I was that resilient. I held a lot of bitterness for years and resentment toward them for the suffering we endured. I was determined to make a better life and be different than my parents.
Today I am determined to uncross my arms and lean forward and try to get my sense of expectancy back. I must admit that the past few months have been met with a "What are You going to do to me today" attitude. I want to change that. It is time for this man of self proclaimed faith to "put up or shut up" and start living a life of expectancy again.
Blessings
Allen
I was about to put the book down when I came across a portion of the book that talked about "leaning forward" to hear what the Holy Spirit was saying. My heart was immediately pricked.
Recently we felt the call of God to return to our home church. We had not idea why, at this time, that God was leading us in this direction; we just knew it was time to go home. It's been almost 20 years since we've been there. Since that time they have added staff members, added a service and moved to a larger facility. Not much else has changed. Most of the faces of the people we loved all those years ago are still present along with a host of new ones; some born in and some coming into the fellowship on their own. Regardless, it's good to be home.
Why did this subject come up today? A couple of days ago Patricia and I were talking about how hungry our hearts were for real worship. We have found ourselves in the "sitting back" position not really expecting God to do anything miraculous. What a shame for a family who has experienced God in real and tangible ways.
How do I get back to a "leaning forward" position? I'm not really sure.
I reflected yesterday about how I had written something that had been misinterpreted and misunderstood by someone. I talked about how it had taken the wind out of my sails and I had not written much because of it. That posting was about expectancy. How ironic that the subject that was so fresh on my mind yesterday is again in the forefront of my mind. I remember the intimate times with my Father. I have experienced times of closeness that were so real that I believed that if I stretched out my hand, I would touch His face. Where has my sense of wonder gone? Why am I no longer leaning forward to hear His voice? Somewhere along the road I have leaned back and crossed my arms instead of leaning forward and listening intently to what God has to say about our situation.
Our family has faced struggle this past year and I'm afraid that the end is not in sight. How we will make it through the dark days to come is beyond me. I find myself in a state of anger sometimes. I wish I could just get to the place where I simply trusted God. I look into the faces of my family and am consumed with such guilt. I feel that I have failed them. "Children are resilient" I am told. "They will remember the faith you showed and the fact that the family held together through the tough times". I grew up poor, not because my parents didn't make good money but because my dad drank and gambled it away. There was little left after he paid his weekly bar tab and the gambling debts. Mom worked hard for minimum wage to afford us the things we had. I don't think I was that resilient. I held a lot of bitterness for years and resentment toward them for the suffering we endured. I was determined to make a better life and be different than my parents.
Today I am determined to uncross my arms and lean forward and try to get my sense of expectancy back. I must admit that the past few months have been met with a "What are You going to do to me today" attitude. I want to change that. It is time for this man of self proclaimed faith to "put up or shut up" and start living a life of expectancy again.
Blessings
Allen
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
2011
It's been a while since I last posted. Lots of reasons for that. Mainly, it seems that something I posted months ago was misunderstood by someone who should have known better and it really took the wind out of my sails for a while. I pour my heart out on this blog and it's intention is to chronicle my spiritual journey. I've attenpted to post a few times but each time I tired, I found that only angry words appeared on my screen. I have Facebook to post on if I feel the need to let off some steam. (LOL)
Anyway, a lot has happened since my last post. I am doing online school at Liberty. Patricia has joined me and will begin classes this month. I changed my major from Religion to Psychology/Christian Counseling because I just felt like I was wasting my time majoring in religion when I don't feel called to preach. That and the fact that the Theology class I took last quarter and the Acts class I just finished opened my eyes to the fact that I will never be a theologian. I just want to be a simple person that loves God with all his heart, mind and soul. I don't care about all the "deep spiritual" things. Well, let me rephrase that, I care but I don't think I should spend the rest of my life in school only to find out that God wasn't as concerned with doctrines that divide us as we thought. I took a long look at the world and with the shape the economy is in and the devestation I see all over the world, I figured, Christian Counseling is where I should be. We have way enough religion and it doesn't seem to being doing it's job as far as healing the hurt that the world is feeling right now. Oops! I'm starting to sound bitter again.
So.. let's catch up.
As of the writing of this post, we are in the process of putting our home in Short Sale. Long story short, we were turned down for our second application for loan modification. There just isn't enough money to go around. I am one of the vast numbers of underemployed people and Patricia is still unemployed. We've cut corners and clipped coupons and everything imagineable to makes end meet and nothing is working. If Patricia hadn't become the Coupon vixen we would not have had groceries at times. That along with the residual financial aid we get from school, we have been able to survive.
Regardless, there is not enough to support our family and keep our home. We don't know at this time, how this will all end up or where we will have to live. We don't even know the time table; that is up to God and the SunTrust Mortgage.
Anyway, if you read this post, don't feel bad for us. We are scared and at times worried, but our faith in God remains strong. We are praying constantly for a miracle. My son says, "All that matters is that we're together". That is the truth.
I hope that one day we will all look back on this time and feel blessed.
Blessings
Allen
Anyway, a lot has happened since my last post. I am doing online school at Liberty. Patricia has joined me and will begin classes this month. I changed my major from Religion to Psychology/Christian Counseling because I just felt like I was wasting my time majoring in religion when I don't feel called to preach. That and the fact that the Theology class I took last quarter and the Acts class I just finished opened my eyes to the fact that I will never be a theologian. I just want to be a simple person that loves God with all his heart, mind and soul. I don't care about all the "deep spiritual" things. Well, let me rephrase that, I care but I don't think I should spend the rest of my life in school only to find out that God wasn't as concerned with doctrines that divide us as we thought. I took a long look at the world and with the shape the economy is in and the devestation I see all over the world, I figured, Christian Counseling is where I should be. We have way enough religion and it doesn't seem to being doing it's job as far as healing the hurt that the world is feeling right now. Oops! I'm starting to sound bitter again.
So.. let's catch up.
As of the writing of this post, we are in the process of putting our home in Short Sale. Long story short, we were turned down for our second application for loan modification. There just isn't enough money to go around. I am one of the vast numbers of underemployed people and Patricia is still unemployed. We've cut corners and clipped coupons and everything imagineable to makes end meet and nothing is working. If Patricia hadn't become the Coupon vixen we would not have had groceries at times. That along with the residual financial aid we get from school, we have been able to survive.
Regardless, there is not enough to support our family and keep our home. We don't know at this time, how this will all end up or where we will have to live. We don't even know the time table; that is up to God and the SunTrust Mortgage.
Anyway, if you read this post, don't feel bad for us. We are scared and at times worried, but our faith in God remains strong. We are praying constantly for a miracle. My son says, "All that matters is that we're together". That is the truth.
I hope that one day we will all look back on this time and feel blessed.
Blessings
Allen
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Giving Thanks
I had this assignment for my Worship class last quarter. The class was awesome and I was not prepared for how it would change my life and the lives of my children.
Giving Thanks and Encouraging Others in Thanksgiving
Allen Cooke
WRSP410
Dr. Rodney Whaley
Liberty University, July 15, 2010
Part 1
When I first was given the assignment to spend two weeks of prayer time in thanksgiving, I thought, “There is no way I can be thankful for 20 minutes”. In one of the videos Dow Robinson said something to the effect that we would find ourselves spending much more time than 20 minutes in prayer.
I have never been one to follow an assignment to the letter. I am somewhat of an overachiever so I feel that I have to go a little further than the assignment requires. So I decided that I would spend all of my daily prayer time in thanksgiving. I had resolved myself to the fact that for two weeks, I would not ask God for anything; I would just be thankful.
I went to bed on Saturday night, June 19th and ask God to teach me to be thankful and went ahead and got prayer coverage for the next two weeks. I assumed that God would probably have to check my pulse during the next two weeks because of my lack of constant begging and complaining. I made a commitment and I was determined to stick to it.
June 20th, 2010 Day One
I woke up this morning ready to begin my period of thankfulness. I thought that Sunday would be a good day because we have church and it’s really easy to be spiritual on Sunday. I got up before the rest of the family and prepared to get in the shower. Normally I am greeted with the warmth of the water and the steam bellowing from the shower. There was no steam or warmth. There was no hot water. Normally on a South Georgia night at the end of June temperatures would hover around 75 to 80 degrees at night so even though the water would not be the normal 120 degrees it would still be tolerable. Apparently we had a cold snap and the temperature had dipped down to around 68 degrees. 68 Degrees when you’re outside on the porch is nice; when it’s spraying out of a shower head it is frigid. I quickly showered and put on some clothes so I could go into the attic and see what the problem was. I went up the stairs into the attic and got on my knees in front of water heater. I was just about to say, “Lord, not again” ( the same thing had happened a couple of months before) when I heard a little voice say, “Be thankful”. I was reminded of my commitment to be thankful so as I knelt there still shivering from the cold shower, I took the opportunity to thank God for fresh water that ran into the house. I was reminded of a missionary friend of mine who told me stories of people who carried stagnant water in jugs for miles back to their thatch roof houses. Sometimes that had no houses at all; only cardboard boxes. I thanked God that I had a real house and running water, no matter how cold, and that I didn’t have to carry it for miles. I was reminded of the Dennis Jernigan song “Thank You Lord”. I started singing it in my head. I woke the rest of the family and let them know that we would be taking cold showers, then I sat at the keyboard and began to sing, “For all that You’ve done, I will thank You. For all that You’re going to do. For all that You’ve promised and all that You are, is all that has carried me through. Jesus, I thank You.” About that time Ashley and Hannah walked into the living room. I could feel the tension in the air as Ashley said, “You’re kidding me, right?” I said, “No, we don’t have hot water. But we’re going to be thankful”. I continued singing, “Thank You for loving and setting me free. Thank You for giving Your life just for me.” By this time Hannah had sat behind me on the couch. The tension melted and we got ready for church.
Today at Sunday school, I shared with my class the commitment that I had made to be thankful and to not ask God for anything for two weeks. I also presented to them the idea that they should try the same thing. They all looked at me like I had lost my mind. Ashley and Hannah were in that class and I could tell that this whole thing was really affecting Ashley. She’s the most emotional of the girls. Hannah is a little harder nut to crack. We spent time going around the room and one at a time saying what we were thankful. By the end of the time of thankfulness, we were all pretty much in tears.
I had borrowed a guitar from the Praise Team and brought it to class. I shared the song “Thank You Lord” with them and shared a little of the story of Dennis Jernigan.
Today, I am a thankful man. I have been reminded that no matter how difficult the circumstances seem; we still have a reason to be thankful. Today, my worship was real. Dow Robinson said that thankfulness is the key to God’s presence. I have experienced that today. I am thankful.
June 23, 2010
Things were really crazy at work today. The contract with CH2M Hill will end next week and all of us are wondering if we will have jobs next week when the county takes over Public Works. We have been assured by the county that we will all be offered jobs but we are unsure what jobs we will be offered and at what rate of pay. Most of the guys I work with have much more to lose than I do. I am not a permanent employee and so I have no investment in the company other than the six months I have been here.
No matter what happens, I am committed to be thankful. I am thankful to have a job today. I am thankful to have food and electricity today. I am thankful I have a Diet Coke in the fridge and lunch in my desk drawer.
Larry (my boss) is busy trying to get everything tied up for the transition. I fully intended to win his soul and after June 30th my opportunity will be gone. I can only thank God for the opportunity to be in his life and hope that he saw Jesus in mine.
There are serious looks on the faces of the men around me. I keep trying to assure them that God is in control. I have my moments of doubt but I know God and I know that He is faithful. I also know that He is not worried about the future and He is not afraid.
June 24, 2010
We arrived at Memorial Hospital for Patricia’s surgery this morning. Even though I have committed to only be thankful and to not ask God for anything for two weeks, I thought that God would understand that I needed to intercede for my wife. I am thankful though for a Godly wife that wants me to pray with her. I hear the guys I work with talk about having complete tyrants as wives. I am thankful that I have a very good one. I would love to be able to provide a better living and a bigger house but she has always been content with whatever we had. It is a blessing to have a Godly wife. I am thankful.
June 30th, 2010
It’s been a week and a half since I started this journey to thankfulness. It’s been tough at times and easy at times. Today was one of those mixed days. Today was the last day of our contract with the county. We had a dinner for all the employees to say “Goodbye” to some and “See you tomorrow” to others. I am one of the fortunate ones that has been asked to stay. It was hard to be thankful when they handed me my offer letter that showed a reduction of my salary but I responded to the man who would be my new boss, “I am a believer and I believe that God takes care of me. I have chosen just to be thankful for whatever He chooses to bless me with”. A year ago I was unemployed and we literally didn’t know where the next meal was coming from. Today, I have assurance of a job with benefits. I asked God to just remind me what I had to be thankful for and He gently reminded me that for over a year I haven’t had insurance; before that I had no life insurance or hope of retirement. This job, even though the pay is lower than I expected, offers me all of those things. I am assured that He is taking care of us even when we think that we could do a better job sometimes. He is still God and He is not shocked or taken by surprise. He never says, “I didn’t expect that”.
I am thankful today for the past six months with some of the most colorful people I have ever met. These are the sort of people that you want to carry with you into battle. Not a holy bunch that you would find sitting next to you in church, but good, hard-working men who would fight to the death for a friend.
I am thankful that God has given me calmness and a trust in all the changes. I am thankful that He has given me a job that provides for my family. I am thankful that He is showing me how to be grateful and content with what I have.
July 4th, 2010
Today marks two weeks since I began this period of thankfulness and it ended the same way it began; with no hot water. I almost laughed when I turned on the water this morning to find chilly water instead nice steamy hot water. It wasn’t quite as much of a struggle to be thankful today as it was two weeks ago. What a transformation!
Patricia still has not been feeling well since her surgery on the 24th so we had tentatively planned to stay home from church this morning. We spent yesterday evening in the emergency room because of an infection from her surgery so she was feeling pretty bad.
I woke Micah up so we could go to town and pick up Tricia’s prescriptions. Our plan was to drop the prescriptions by the pharmacy and then run over to Lowes just to look around while we waited. I told Micah, “They have grill I really want but your job is not let me buy it”. Things never go as planned in our family. The pharmacy didn’t open until 10AM on Sundays so that meant we had time to kill. Two Cooke men with time on their hands and a little money in their pockets is not a good combination. Anyway, Micah did not fulfill his duties. I bought the grill I wanted.
This afternoon we spent putting the grill together because the assembled grill would not fit in the Durango. I am thankful that I got to spend the afternoon with my son doing “man” stuff. I am also thankful for $4 prescriptions since I spent a king’s ransom on the grill. (We bought a few fireworks too) I am thankful that we have hot water again. I am thankful that today we are celebrating our country’s birthday and independence. We will celebrate like so many other families; we will grill (on my brand new grill) and light some fireworks. This celebration will be different though. This year I am truly thankful. The past two weeks have changed me and allowed me to see those things that I cherish and I am truly thankful.
Part 2
Thankfulness as the Key to Worship
I. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 “Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.”
a. Introduction and explanation of the assignment
b. Explaining the process
II. Thankfulness; the key to worship
a. Psalm 100:4 “Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.”
b. Using your key.
III. Spend time in thanks
IV. Thank You Lord
a. The story behind the song.
b. “Thank You Lord”
V. Enter into His Gates
Part 3
What do you have to tell others about not only what scripture teaches but how one can live these teachings about giving thanks through prayer?”
In Video Lesson #2, Mike Coleman made a statement that was pivotal for me. He stated that God’s will for our lives was that we be thankful. (1 Thessalonians 5:18) I guess that is what I would tell anyone about living a lifestyle of thankfulness.
We are so consumed sometimes with seeking the will of God. I, myself, have spent countless hours in prayer seeking the Lord’s will for my life.
I have always instructed my Sunday school class that there are prayers that God will not leave unanswered. God will answer those prayers that will draw us closer to Him. If we pray that God will make us thankful, He will do it, because it is His will for us. His ultimate desire for us is that we be in close relationship with Him.
I am a worship leader and I guess I never made the connection between thankfulness and worship. When I looked back at those experiences in corporate worship that were the most meaningful I noticed that those were times when we had taken time to express our thankfulness to God first. Mr. Coleman stated that thanksgiving is the key to worship. I immediately thought about how meaningful the worship services during the Christmas season always seem to be. We begin that season with the holiday of Thanksgiving. Could it be that God honors us because we, as a nation, take pause for thanksgiving?
I have already changed my methods of worship. Whether I am leading a congregation or am spending time in personal worship, I begin with thanksgiving. I am trying to not only make my lifestyle a lifestyle of worship, but also of thanksgiving. One cannot exist without the other.
Part 4 Follow up on those who listened to your presentation to see if they were motivated enough to practice a greater level of thanksgiving in their own lives.
During the course of this assignment my family felt the leading of God to leave the church we were attending and to search for a new church. I no longer have contact with the entire class that I presented this to. My two daughters were members of that class so I asked them whether or not they were motivated by my presentation.
I emailed my daughters and asked them how that lesson had changed their way of thinking. This was my oldest daughter, Ashley’s, reply:
Okay...here's what I'm going to relate it to...Do you remember last night when we were watching Everybody Loves Raymond and Debra was being super nice to Marie and pretending like nothing bothered her? Well, other than Debra blowing up in the end, that's kind of the perspective, I took. Rather than saying negative things I substituted in positive things and even decided to change my status on FB talking about being thankful for things for about a week to keep me motivated. I did pretty well, until the hot water heater broke for the 3rd time! Life happens and makes us take things for granted...if you take the time to be thankful in life and your prayers, it brings to light the little everyday things you should be thankful for.
But seriously, it did motivate me just by hearing and seeing the difference it made in you. Changing the way you think about things can change your whole attitude!
And this was my youngest daughter, Hannah’s response:
My dad's lesson motivated me a lot. When you think about how much we have been through as a family and then the stuff that my parents have had to go through alone, it is very unlikely for someone these days to be thankful, but obviously my dad isn’t like people these days. Being thankful is more than just saying “thank you” every once in a while. It is about actually feeling overwhelmed with a feeling of love and knowing that there is no way you deserve it; that is a feeling of true thankfulness. I only learned this by watching my parents. Me and my sister, after hearing the lesson on thankfulness from my dad, decided to be more thankful for the things that we have instead of the things that we are missing. It really puts you in a different place to look at life. God has blessed our family more then you can know, but we have also had some really hard times. I am so thankful for every situation that we have been through because it makes us love our God so much more!
I have much for which to be thankful.
§ Instructor FeedbackI have much for which to be thankful.
Grade : 100 out of 100
Comments : Wow! What an experience reading your assignment (journal). I read every word of it. In fact I was drawn to it like a magnet. Ashley's and Hannah's response brought tears to my eyes. What you did before your daughters is more important than the grill, the house, or anything else you may ever own. They will be changed forever and their love for you is far more deeper. God is dong a great work in you. I will covet to pray with your regarding your home. Also, if I am ever in South Georgia, I'll bring the steaks and we can try out that new grill. God bless you, my friend, Dr. Whaley
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
In Whom Will You Trust?
This past Sunday I attended Bacalaurette Service for the 2010 graduates. My daughter is among that number so we fulfilled our duty as her family and attended with her. We were excited about the service because the keynote speaker was Dr Ferguson, the Dean of Fine Arts at Young Harris College, where Hannah has decided to attend.
His message that day was "In Whom Will You Trust?". He gave several life examples from his own experiences of how things looked bleak, yet God worked them out for good.
I need those words today. After months of grappling over budgets and control, the county I live in decided at a Commissioner's meeting today that the contract between the county and the company I work for would not be extended.
How do I feel? Let down. I have kept my head up and have not let myself be fearful. I have had a supernatural peace and have tried my best to encourage my fellow employees that this was all going to work out.
I prayed that God woud take this whole situation and bring Himself honor. I prayed that He would work in such a miraculous way that all eyes would see His glory and know that God had come to our rescue. He didn't come and I feel let down. Maybe I didn't pray hard enough. Maybe I was wrong to worry Him with something so trivial when the world is going to Hell in a handbasket.
In only a moment all the peace I had is gone. I have a little over a month before, once again, I find myself in the unemployment line. There is a chance that I could continue to work for the county but the pay scale for my position is far less than what I make now. I had already taken a pay reduction when I took this job. I feel let down. I also feel like a failure.
I remember just four years ago at this same time Ashley was graduating. I was an emotional wreck. Just months before I had left my position in the ministry and I was totally lost. I didn't know what to do. Ashley had already paid all of her expenses for graduation. Had it not been that we received a gift card for helping with Chorus, we wouldn't have been able to have a celebratory dinner. I had no idea what the future held for us as a family. I only knew that I felt let down. I felt like a failure.
I remember thinking a few days ago that I was going to be able to enjoy Hannah's graduation. Even though things are tight; at least I have a job. At least I know there are groceries at home. I find myself experiencing the same emotions.
In whom will you trust? That is the phrase that keeps playing in my mind. I am a little angry. It's hard to trust God sometimes. It's hard to understand the reasons for the path He leads us down. You know, I am tempted to answer, "I will trust in me because that is the only one I can really depend on". I don't even trust in me right now.
I know that I will leave work today and return tomorrow with a different attitude. I made great claims about God this week. I trusted Him to do something....anything. I didn't ask for myself; I asked for the 30 plus people I work with. Most are unbelievers who desperately needed to see a glimpse of God. I asked for my boss that I know is reachable. I have no reason to love this man. He is impatient and demanding. He is critical and sometimes can be mean. But God has allowed me to love him and pray for his redemption.
Tomorrow will be a new day. I will awake tomorrow and once again trust as always. Today, on the other hand, I feel let down. I feel like a failure.
Blessings
Allen
His message that day was "In Whom Will You Trust?". He gave several life examples from his own experiences of how things looked bleak, yet God worked them out for good.
I need those words today. After months of grappling over budgets and control, the county I live in decided at a Commissioner's meeting today that the contract between the county and the company I work for would not be extended.
How do I feel? Let down. I have kept my head up and have not let myself be fearful. I have had a supernatural peace and have tried my best to encourage my fellow employees that this was all going to work out.
I prayed that God woud take this whole situation and bring Himself honor. I prayed that He would work in such a miraculous way that all eyes would see His glory and know that God had come to our rescue. He didn't come and I feel let down. Maybe I didn't pray hard enough. Maybe I was wrong to worry Him with something so trivial when the world is going to Hell in a handbasket.
In only a moment all the peace I had is gone. I have a little over a month before, once again, I find myself in the unemployment line. There is a chance that I could continue to work for the county but the pay scale for my position is far less than what I make now. I had already taken a pay reduction when I took this job. I feel let down. I also feel like a failure.
I remember just four years ago at this same time Ashley was graduating. I was an emotional wreck. Just months before I had left my position in the ministry and I was totally lost. I didn't know what to do. Ashley had already paid all of her expenses for graduation. Had it not been that we received a gift card for helping with Chorus, we wouldn't have been able to have a celebratory dinner. I had no idea what the future held for us as a family. I only knew that I felt let down. I felt like a failure.
I remember thinking a few days ago that I was going to be able to enjoy Hannah's graduation. Even though things are tight; at least I have a job. At least I know there are groceries at home. I find myself experiencing the same emotions.
In whom will you trust? That is the phrase that keeps playing in my mind. I am a little angry. It's hard to trust God sometimes. It's hard to understand the reasons for the path He leads us down. You know, I am tempted to answer, "I will trust in me because that is the only one I can really depend on". I don't even trust in me right now.
I know that I will leave work today and return tomorrow with a different attitude. I made great claims about God this week. I trusted Him to do something....anything. I didn't ask for myself; I asked for the 30 plus people I work with. Most are unbelievers who desperately needed to see a glimpse of God. I asked for my boss that I know is reachable. I have no reason to love this man. He is impatient and demanding. He is critical and sometimes can be mean. But God has allowed me to love him and pray for his redemption.
Tomorrow will be a new day. I will awake tomorrow and once again trust as always. Today, on the other hand, I feel let down. I feel like a failure.
Blessings
Allen
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